the requisite mac and cheese recipe

One of us likes to read theory and make out with boys. One of us likes to read theory and make out with girls. The one of us who likes to make out with boys will occasionally cook for them between the reading and the making out. This is what she makes for them. It is, objectively speaking, the best mac and cheese recipe in the greater Chicagoland area.

* egg noodles-- about half the bag.
* gruyere cheese-- the size of a midpriced digital camera
* heavy cream-- about a cup (notice that with a pint of cream and a bag of egg noodles, you'll be able to make two recipes. you'll have to buy a lot more gruyere than you anticipate. both times. especially if you'll be snacking on it while you read and/or make out)
* nutmeg
* black pepper

Cook the egg noodles until just before al dente. You're going to bake it, so pace yourself. It's like making out on the first date. Then heat up the heavy cream over low heat. Melt in enough shredded cheese to make a thick sauce. In a worthy baking dish, pour in your egg noodles and your cheese sauce. Grate a thick layer of cheese on top. I keep saying cheese, but only Gruyere is going to be good enough here. Sprinkle on a little more nutmeg than you think you need. Sprinkle on a little less black pepper than you think you need. Put it in a cold oven and heat to broil. By the time the oven heats up and broils the top, the cheese will be perfectly distributed and melted.

Serve with kale. The other one of us is better at telling you what to do with the kale.